Today was such a lovely day, until I realized I had completely run out of options for Patrick for the weekend. Then I realized I needed to drive all the way to Elbow Lake and back so my dad could watch him. Thankfully, traffic was at a minimum and it was smooth sailing. Then I got back to Fargo and quickly got ready for the trip and headed to the stadium, in order to drive the same stretch of road I had just driven....

We watched a couple of crazy Will Ferrell movies on the way down and actually got to the hotel quicker than we normally do! The room I was given was crazy nice, wasn't it?! It's close to the nicest hotel I've ever been in! But, as soon as I saw this awesome room and comfy bed, I thought how awesome it would be to have you right here with me! I'm excited for our vacations so we can have sweet suites like this ;)

Remember the saying I was trying to come up with?

"The days are long, but the years are short."

I have no doubt that, at the end of this 9 or 10 or 13 month long deployment, I will be standing at the airport, waiting for the first glimpse of my soldier. I will be crying and laughing and will hug you so tightly and kiss you so much.

But I'm really scared for the days ahead that seem never ending. The weeks that stretch on and on. I'm scared for the days that I think, "I only met you three weeks before deployment; are we crazy for trying this?" I don't much believe in astrology, but the one thing I desperately believe about my Aquarian self is the need for positivity. When I become overwhelmed, I tend to try every trick to stay positive, and if I can't, I withdraw completely until I can gain balance again. I'm afraid of withdrawing from you, because I can't. I already can't imagine a day without you.

But, alas. I keep my eyes on that distant day when you're flying into Fargo again. I can already feel the butterflies and happiness that that day will give me. My, the way you've changed my world with only a smirk and chivalry.

Know how I know?  I sleep like a baby in your arms, and I toss and turn now that you're gone.  My body pillow has become your replacement.  I woke up smiling this morning, thinking you were in my bed, but that's okay, because I had an awesome sunset to wake up to :) 

I want to lay on the couch with you and listen to Ray LaMontagne sing "Hold You In My Arms" on repeat on a rainy Sunday.

At the peak of my family's pet ownership, we had four dogs, three cats, two birds, four fish, a crayfish, and a pocket gopher. I volunteered at the local humane society most of my teenage and adult life, and my dad was such a sucker for a heart wrenching story. My grandparents also had a farm, and I chased and tamed many a wild kitten in order to smuggle him or her home.

The last one I caught was Winston, a long haired, creamy white, Siamese looking kitty with ice blue eyes. He was sick when I caught him, but I figured he just needed shots and antibiotics. When my dad finally caved and let me keep him, we took him to the vet, who diagnosed him with a rare respiratory disease in which fluid fills his lungs, giving him 40% oxygen capacity. She told us that he wouldn't survive his first birthday. He was laid to rest last summer on a sunny hill overlooking the river just after his 14th birthday. That day was only the second time I've ever seen my dad cry.

He was never a normal cat; he played like a kitten until he died and he sniffled so loudly you could hear him from three rooms away. He was a lover and would cuddle on my lap for hours a day. When the puppies were born (Patrick's litter), he would lay in their nest and clean them all while Delilah (Patrick's mom) took a break. Winston was the only non-human allowed near her babies.

Waking up is a really difficult time for me.  I usually set an alarm far too early so I can begin to motivate myself to actually move long before the actual movement needs to begin.  I don't like to function in the morning before having my coffee.


But with your arms wrapped around me, waking up wasn't so bad ;)

When in doubt, backspace it out.  I have corny jokes too, but yours are better, even if I roll my eyes at them.  I can't wait to hear more and see your adorable smirk.